President Declares Vistory at Health Care Summit

WASHINGTON, DC -- "The Obama's Health Care Summit is to the legislative process what fiber is to the digestive process" a Presidential aid stated today, referring to the recent attempt to get a socialized health care bill moving again in Congress. "It should sweep away obstructions and assist in pushing through a result the President can be proud of."

The Health Care Summit was a last ditch attempt to get congressional leaders from both parties to agree on the best way to deprive Americans of their ability to choose their own health care.

The aid also asserted that the Health Care Summit "did what it was intended to do" and went on to note "we have reports that journalists have been very impressed with his unbiased handling of all viewpoints, in the style of such classic moderators as Kofi Annan and Nikita Khrushchev."