March 25, 2011

Panel of Experts: Bumper Stickers Bringing Democracy to the Middle East

San Francisco, CA -- Those little blue "COEXIST" bumper stickers that are frequently seen on Japanese-made cars are the real reason the Middle East has been plunged into turmoil recently as people in country after country have risen up in revolt, demanding an end to tyranny.  At a conference this week near San Francisco, California, entitled "Why Would Other Countries Possibly Want to be More Like the US?", the topic was discussed at length by a panel of experts during the session called "Bumper Stickers Vs. Bullets."

The panel overwhelming agreed that the bumper stickers were the reason for the recent democratic longings in middle eastern nations, and most discussion concerned the reason why.

Dr. Elaine Waffel-Kohn, Department Chair of Anthropology at Princeton University, presented the following explanation "The logic is a little convoluted and really takes a PhD to understand completely, but I'll try to explain it in simple terms. Because of the Theory of Reciprocation, and conjoined with the well understood phenomenom of the 7 degrees of freedom, when we in this country embrace other cultures around the world, those cultures embrace us back. Even if they don't realize it. It seems counterintuitive, but by doing something towards mutual understanding here we cause other people - even someone thousands of miles away who believes we are infidels and hates us or whatever - to take a look at themselves and re-examine what they believe."


Another possible reason had to do with karmic energy and its well-documented impact on world events. As Professor William Plum, Head of Wiccan Studies at Harvard stated, "The COEXIST bumper stickers each create a small amount of karmic energy - good karmic energy. That energy then floats across the universe and causes peaceful thoughts to enter people everywhere. The more bumper stickers, the more good karma that is produced." When asked, Mr. Plum wasn't sure if the karma was produced when the bumper sticker was printed, purchased, or actually placed on the vehicle.

While the causes may not be exactly known, all participants agreed that the cause was definitely not the United State's stated policy goals of bringing hope and democracy to the parts of the world where it is lacking. As one panel participant stated when asked this question "Oh, come on. There is no doubt that there is a strong yearning for freedom and fair elections in places like Yemen, Egypt, and Libya right now. But which explanation makes more sense? That this yearning was brought about by the US toppling brutal despots and bringing some form of democracy to neighboring countries? Or - much more likely - peace-loving people everywhere proudly dispaying bumper stickers that hope for peace, love, and understanding?"